Reader Caitlin has a question for Coco Tanberry in our regular problem page series… will you agree with Coco's advice?
Caitlin says:
I really love music. I've been playing piano since I was seven and I've loved it ever since. I want to go on getting better, so I am doing my grade exams, but I'd also like to make more opportunities to play. The problem is that when I find something I could do or an event I could play at, I say I will go along on a certain day and then I get scared and say I'll go the next week instead, and finally I chicken out completely. I think I am scared of failing, or of not being good enough. How can I make more opportunities for myself when I feel so anxious inside?
Coco says:
How I wish I had your problem! I love music and I adore playing, but my family aren't impressed… well, let's face it, nobody is impressed. I may well actually be tone deaf. I think you have talent, because you are doing well with your piano - you just need the confidence to match. How do you get confident at something? By doing it lots, so it doesn't seem like a big deal. Practice makes perfect. The first time I gave a speech to my classmates about endangered species, I was terrified… there's a big difference between talking to your friends and sisters and talking to people who may not be so sympathetic. However, I made myself do it and the fear slowly ebbed away, and now if I have to do something like that I hardly think about it. Start gently. Do a short performance for friends and family, then perhaps for neighbours. Then play at a school event or do a concert at the local old folk's home… they will be so grateful and appreciative, I guarantee! Sometimes you just have to make yourself do the things that scare you… until they don't scare you anymore. Pretend to be confident - fake it till you make it. Don't give yourself the option of wriggling out of things… do what you've said you will do, and do it as well as you can. You'll be brilliant!
Cathy says:
I agree with Coco's advice… the way to conquer nerves is to make yourself do the things you are scared of. You'll survive, honest! What advice would YOU give Caitlin? COMMENT BELOW to have your say.
Caitlin says:
I really love music. I've been playing piano since I was seven and I've loved it ever since. I want to go on getting better, so I am doing my grade exams, but I'd also like to make more opportunities to play. The problem is that when I find something I could do or an event I could play at, I say I will go along on a certain day and then I get scared and say I'll go the next week instead, and finally I chicken out completely. I think I am scared of failing, or of not being good enough. How can I make more opportunities for myself when I feel so anxious inside?
How I wish I had your problem! I love music and I adore playing, but my family aren't impressed… well, let's face it, nobody is impressed. I may well actually be tone deaf. I think you have talent, because you are doing well with your piano - you just need the confidence to match. How do you get confident at something? By doing it lots, so it doesn't seem like a big deal. Practice makes perfect. The first time I gave a speech to my classmates about endangered species, I was terrified… there's a big difference between talking to your friends and sisters and talking to people who may not be so sympathetic. However, I made myself do it and the fear slowly ebbed away, and now if I have to do something like that I hardly think about it. Start gently. Do a short performance for friends and family, then perhaps for neighbours. Then play at a school event or do a concert at the local old folk's home… they will be so grateful and appreciative, I guarantee! Sometimes you just have to make yourself do the things that scare you… until they don't scare you anymore. Pretend to be confident - fake it till you make it. Don't give yourself the option of wriggling out of things… do what you've said you will do, and do it as well as you can. You'll be brilliant!
Cathy says:
I agree with Coco's advice… the way to conquer nerves is to make yourself do the things you are scared of. You'll survive, honest! What advice would YOU give Caitlin? COMMENT BELOW to have your say.
This is the advice i took when i went abseiling!
ReplyDelete