Another reader's problem... and this time, Summer Tanberry does her best to sort it out. What do YOU think?
Freya says:
My problem is that I think I'm overweight. My friends have hinted at it a lot and the boys in my class tease me and call me horrible names. I've asked my mum if I can diet but she says there isn't a problem, that I'm just tall and curvy, but I wear a size 16 now and I do feel awkward next to my friends. The trouble is, my parents are quite big and even my brother, who's ten, is big. I think maybe we all have a problem. If I try to eat smaller portions or skip pudding, Mum gets upset, and healthy options just don't exist in our house... it's all junk food and takeaways and family size bottles of coke and bags of crisps. It's not that I want to be thin, but I'd like to feel better about myself and I'd like to be fitter, too. I'm not sporty and I hate PE lessons so much I often forge a note to get out of them.
Summer says:
OK, I guess you know I have a problem with food, right? I started feeling scared that I was getting too big a year or so ago and I began to diet and it got way, way out of control. So I am not a fan of diets, at all. They are really bad for teenagers, according to the doctors I've been seeing lately, so instead of trying to follow some fad diet focus on making healthier choices.
For starters, report the boys who are picking on you; bullying does NOT help anyone's self-esteem. If your family are hooked on junk food, it may take time to change them; why not cook once or twice a week and make healthy versions of their favourite meal? If you're shopping with them, put a few healthy choices into the trolley, too... fresh fruit and veg, wholemeal bread, lean protein. Check out a library book on healthy eating for recipes to get you started. I think that junk foods can be a bit addictive, but I suspect that deep down your family know they're not making the best food choices. Perhaps an auntie or cousin would have a word with your mum for you, and help you get the healthy eating message across? A trip to the cinema doesn't have to include slushies and popcorn, a day in town doesn't have to include a trip to MacDonalds... treats don't have to be food-related.
You say you're not sporty, but I think you know how important fitness is... so try to find something you do enjoy! I am not great at team sports like netball and hockey, for example, but love dance - maybe you would too? It's never too late to start, and dance is a great workout! If it's not for you, try swimming, running, zumba, cycling, aerobics... anything that gets you moving. If all else fails, start walking everywhere - your fitness levels will skyrocket, and soon you'll move on to cycling or running. Exercise is one of those things where the more you do, the more you love it... taking the first few steps is the tricky bit. I bet your friends would love to help by going swimming with you or trying out tennis in the park or planning a bike expedition to the next town.
One last word of warning; I got all wound up about my weight when there wasn't really a problem in the first place. Making healthier food choices and taking up a sport is one thing, but if you are still worried about this see your doctor - he/she can tell you if you are a healthy weight for your height and build, and if not, suggest ways to help. And if you do decide to change the way you eat... well, just be careful not to take it too far...
Summer's advice is good... but what would YOU add to it? MESSAGE BELOW to offer your advice and support to Freya and share your own experiences!
My problem is that I think I'm overweight. My friends have hinted at it a lot and the boys in my class tease me and call me horrible names. I've asked my mum if I can diet but she says there isn't a problem, that I'm just tall and curvy, but I wear a size 16 now and I do feel awkward next to my friends. The trouble is, my parents are quite big and even my brother, who's ten, is big. I think maybe we all have a problem. If I try to eat smaller portions or skip pudding, Mum gets upset, and healthy options just don't exist in our house... it's all junk food and takeaways and family size bottles of coke and bags of crisps. It's not that I want to be thin, but I'd like to feel better about myself and I'd like to be fitter, too. I'm not sporty and I hate PE lessons so much I often forge a note to get out of them.
OK, I guess you know I have a problem with food, right? I started feeling scared that I was getting too big a year or so ago and I began to diet and it got way, way out of control. So I am not a fan of diets, at all. They are really bad for teenagers, according to the doctors I've been seeing lately, so instead of trying to follow some fad diet focus on making healthier choices.
For starters, report the boys who are picking on you; bullying does NOT help anyone's self-esteem. If your family are hooked on junk food, it may take time to change them; why not cook once or twice a week and make healthy versions of their favourite meal? If you're shopping with them, put a few healthy choices into the trolley, too... fresh fruit and veg, wholemeal bread, lean protein. Check out a library book on healthy eating for recipes to get you started. I think that junk foods can be a bit addictive, but I suspect that deep down your family know they're not making the best food choices. Perhaps an auntie or cousin would have a word with your mum for you, and help you get the healthy eating message across? A trip to the cinema doesn't have to include slushies and popcorn, a day in town doesn't have to include a trip to MacDonalds... treats don't have to be food-related.
You say you're not sporty, but I think you know how important fitness is... so try to find something you do enjoy! I am not great at team sports like netball and hockey, for example, but love dance - maybe you would too? It's never too late to start, and dance is a great workout! If it's not for you, try swimming, running, zumba, cycling, aerobics... anything that gets you moving. If all else fails, start walking everywhere - your fitness levels will skyrocket, and soon you'll move on to cycling or running. Exercise is one of those things where the more you do, the more you love it... taking the first few steps is the tricky bit. I bet your friends would love to help by going swimming with you or trying out tennis in the park or planning a bike expedition to the next town.
One last word of warning; I got all wound up about my weight when there wasn't really a problem in the first place. Making healthier food choices and taking up a sport is one thing, but if you are still worried about this see your doctor - he/she can tell you if you are a healthy weight for your height and build, and if not, suggest ways to help. And if you do decide to change the way you eat... well, just be careful not to take it too far...
Summer's advice is good... but what would YOU add to it? MESSAGE BELOW to offer your advice and support to Freya and share your own experiences!
I have no problems with my weight.
ReplyDeleteI'm quite skinny to the extent of underweight.
Eat more fruits and veggies.
Freya. You are whoever you want to be! It doesn't matter what everyone says about you. Have faith in your own self. I honestly think that your not fat but just developing curves. Once you're fully grown up you'll look really cute trust me! If you feel like you're not eating healthily (and you will feel it. It's a sixth sense!) just find ways to sneak healthy stuff into what you eat like getting ice cream with fruit or puuting mixed veg with chips. Exercise-wise I have two words. Just Dance. I was super lazy before I got #4 for my birthday and now I play it almost everyday! It's got all the fun crazy songs and I find it really hard to get bored of. You can play with friends and family. Being bored isn't possible without that game around. And don't be demotivated if you can't dance that well at first. I started out with no stars on 1st difficulty songs and 7 months later I'm getting 5 stars in extreme songs and I'm fitter than ever. Just Dance is a way of working out without even realising. Try it out!
ReplyDeleteI agree u give such good advice deborah! Hamdi:)xxx
DeleteAnd also, scientific fact, skipping meals tricks your body into thinking you're not going to eat making it store more fat to preserve you. Don't ever skip!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand what is the problem of being fat.......
ReplyDeleteWho cares !
I think that if you are really worried take Summers advice but I wouldn't worry about it if I were you.
ReplyDeleteWhat I'd do if I was Freya i would mix and match healthy and junky. For example making carrot or vegatble crisps at first so your family get used to it then move to something more heathy. Blondie
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletegreat advice summer
ReplyDeletebe carefull dieting is bad news be who you are who cares about weight its the person inside that counts be a good person and good people will overlook your appearance who cares what others think they probably feel so self conscious that they have to pick on someone else BE YOURSELF
ReplyDeleteFreya, Your weight shouldn't matter. Ask your friends and family what they like about you- don't think of the negative, think of the positive. Whenever you are feeling down just remember the brilliant features of you. It's about what's on the inside and not outside :)
ReplyDeleteYou are uber-lucky. I can bet your average weight and trust me you are LUCKY!!!!!!!! My skirt is the smallest that you can get. Just the other day it started to fall!!!!!!!! You don't need to diet. Skinniness is a curse! ( BTW the first place to lose weight and the last place where you gain weight is your boobs!!!)
ReplyDelete